Extremism or Simply Obeying?

I'm back after a long long long sabbatical. The past months has been of much awakening for me. I've really been challenged to live a life of Christ, die to myself and to take up my cross.

It became clearer to me that if I want to live a life of Christ, with Christ, I cannot linger on to my current self-focused(a gentler word for self-centered) attitude.
I was reminded that I cannot be raised with Christ if I do not participate in the dying with Christ bit. Meaning, a total and complete death to self. As Paul noted, "For me to live is Christ, to die is gain".
I cannot see how I can hang on to somethings with my left hand and do the works of Christ with my right hand accomplishing the dying to self prerequisite.

I use to think and ask God to help me put Christ in my workplace and everywhere else I go. I've even learnt practical examples such as saying a little prayer before I send out an email to clients, as if in partnership with Christ for the daily businesses I go about in the office.

However, I missed the ENTIRE POINT. My focus has always been doing well at my workplace. Perhaps even subconsciously hoping for recognition and a better career in the future.
What's wrong with that, you say?
Well, nothing except that I've not been called into being to pursue a career, accomplish a great task or advance my stature.

I've been CALLED to love God, to build my relationship with Christ. In Rick Warren's acclaimed book "Purpose Driven Life", he noted that man will never find his purpose in life as long as he is looking in the wrong places, such as his personal wishes and dreams. Take special note that in Genesis, God created Adam to have fellowship with Himself. Christ came to die for us also so that we might be restored to have relationship with God. Our purpose IS to return to our ORIGINAL PURPOSE for being and our SOLE INTENDED REASON, which is to fellowship with God.

How does THAT fit into our life on earth? Our workplace? Our church? By working our focus toward the things of heaven. By reminding myself to live in eternity with God.
If I were to put God first in my life, career will not matter anymore. My sense of security from the advancement of my financial state and job in the future dies. My dependency on God for all that I need is realized.

I know that when my mind, heart, soul and strength are focused on God and how He wants me to live with my fellowmen, I will have nothing to worry about (Seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things will be added unto you - Matt 6:33).

And so, in knowing better the truth about my life, I struggle. It is next to impossible to live my life 100% to God at work. Each time I meet a client, report to my boss, interact with my colleagues, drive on a busy highway, my human nature tries to take over. But what is impossible with men is possible with God. So we give glory to God. And I struggle on. And more so I come in constant fight against doing what I should not do, and not doing what I should be doing.

I pray that God will constantly hold my hand in my struggles, that I may gladly submit my life and struggles to Him, until the day I come back into His presence.

To God be all glory and honor.

Dave D Saved